morons, part 3

  • Posted on
  • by

Continued from here

Class 4 Moron
(Labelus makem)

Job #1 with this guy isn't to articulate a point. It isn't even to refute yours. Nope. Where others use premises in support of an argument, he lazily applies labels to people in the hopes that people smarter than him will fill in the blanks and construct an argument for him.

Example: Among Microsoft wives, I'm known as an Apple "fanboy." This is because I own an iPad instead of the vastly superior Microsoft tablet that doesn't exist yet. Meanwhile, at work, Apple users call me a "hater" because I pointed out that Macs are causing compatibility problems. This is the elegance of Labelus makin: I am both a fanboy and a hater; I am whatever conveniences them at the time.

Earther: "The circumnavigators are modern day Nazis."

Class 5 Moron
(Pointis absentis)

The even more witless cousin of Class 4, he substitutes trite, meaningless dismissals for substance.

Examples: "Who cares?" "Wake up!" "I have to laugh!" "I hate to say it, but..."

Earther: "Stay classy, Columbus."

wakeUpToSolarS.gif