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"Have you binged it?" asked the Microsoft wife, crowbarring that "verb" into his sentence as conspicuously as a newly engaged 18 year-old girl drops the term "my fiance" into every sentence.

I barely understand Microsoft employees exhibiting this sort of corporate-patriotic brandemonium. I will never get their spouses also slurping the Kool Aid. Worse still, they try to engage me in conversation about, well, what I do for a living. Do doctors' spouses try to debate bone grafts with doctors?

But please, continue. Tell me about the game-changing paradigm shift that is your new Windows 7 phone.