"Don't say that about poor, sweet Fredo!" countless women have scolded me after I've called him a moron. Idiocy and sweetness are not only not mutually exclusive; the former likely results in the latter. Nevertheless, many people have rushed to this simpleton's defense.
- He did not know his name until he was three.
- He once took a dump on a park bench with his front paws on the ground.
- As evidence of his impairment mounted, I decided to test its depths. I pantomimed opening the tailgate. His sister simply stared at me, wondering why I did that. Fredo impaled his face into the back of the car.
I shall now present his latest exhibit. I was able to get the photo only because he sniffed the statue's butt a second time.