drive-by momming

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I ventured into the outside world yesterday, always a mistake.

Madam's parents are staying in the house next door this month, which typically means only one thing to me: no whizzing off the deck. But late last night, they drunkenly waved me over. For some reason, I accepted.

This is what I remember of our conversation.

Blah blah Microsoft

"What did you think when you found out it was two women moving in next door?" Mom asked, for some reason amused by her question.

Blah blah boats

"I always feel bad for you. The girls don't take very good care of the house," Mom said.

Blah blah Percy

"Percy took really good care of the place. You must miss that," Mom baited.

Blah blah big government

"I love Madam and Eve, but they sure are weird, you know?" Mom said, shaking her head with concern while she waited for me to give the slightest response that she could later quote.

Blah blah their daughter's partner

"Well, she's Chinese. They're a humorless people, don't you think?"

You get the idea. Mom spent the entire evening shaking me by my ankles, hoping that a weapon she could use would fall out.
And...time....just...flew....by.

"How often do you see your family, John?" Mom asked at one point.

I shrugged and stared at Puget Sound. "I don't much see the point."