The dinner conversation was about monsters and their innumerable hiding places in the kids' rooms. These not being my kids, I wasn't sure if Santa Claus rules were in effect. Hmm. Is it okay to say there's no such thing as monsters? I can't really see the downside, but on the other hand, parents are really weird. No, best to err on the side of caution and pretend that something IS trying to disembowel them in their sleep.
That conversation winding down, Mom asked me a question I never know how to answer. "What are you afraid of, John?"
"A 13 year old son showing up at my door with a suitcase, a tuba, and a skull bong," I replied.
"Ha, ha. No, really."
Well, crap. I don't really feel fear, not like she meant it. I'd like to pretend this is a function of heroism (I'm Daredevil: The Man Without Fear!®) or bravery, but I think it's more that I'm just broken that way. I used up all my fear during childhood. Compared to how I grew up, nothing in adulthood is remotely scary. I don't fear being alone, unemployed, disliked, assaulted, and so forth. I would rather have had a decent childhood, but my experience was not without an upside.
Of course, the downside is that I'm often alone, unemployed, disliked, and punched.