Not that further proof of my intellectual degradation was needed, but yesterday was a landmark of sorts.
Sequence One
The following took place in a split second. I was towing my boat to the mechanic. During a right turn, I set my bottle of Diet Coke into the right coaster in the truck's console. My boat keys were already in there, and the bottle toppled about, splashing everywhere and filling the left coaster. My iPhone was nearby, and I quickly flipped it to the safety of the dash. The sloped dash. Splash!
Sequence Two
I stopped at a self-serve car wash to scrub down the boat. Washing the roof required that I balance on the narrow (5") side of the boat, some six feet in the air. My full weight on my toes, I fired the sprayer. It's not often in life that you think of Newton's Third Law of Motion while actually still in motion, but there I was. Splat!
I launched violently backward into the wall of the wash bay, and I slid down coyote-style. My whole body hurts today.