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July 5, 2011
hermetically sealed
You doubtless know someone who grows uncomfortable in social situations and leaves. Perhaps you're that sort of person, yourself. Where that trait intersects "prick," you will find me. I am not shy. I am not demophobic. I simply dislike most people, and I don't feel particularly compelled to politely suffer them. Thus do I get up and leave.
On Saturday, I had plans to have dinner with Kiki and Dirt at their place. Saturday passed into late afternoon, and I never heard from them, so I texted Kiki. She replied "Come by for a smoke at 8?" This is to dinner plans what a downgrade to "coffee?" is to a date. Kiki does this to me all the time. When you yourself don't break plans you've made, it's infuriating.
At 8, I pulled into their driveway and saw another vehicle. Awesome. This is the person who ate my dinner, I presume. In the distance I saw Dirt, who waved at me, then called after me as he saw me turning my car around and driving out the way I'd come. Nuts to this. I'm going home.
I shall now share the voice mail Dirt left me, verbatim. Here is his sales pitch for me to return:
"John, forget something? Uuuhh, that's my friend Rob, who currently has a No Contact Order and was just thrown in jail and he's been here for a couple days and I think he's back on crack. So don't get carried away, it's not Kiki's mom. Stop by!"
posted by john at 9:12 AM • permalink