their, they're. it'll bee okay.

I've long delighted in morons misspelling their insults of others' intelligence. I give you this masturbating chimpanzee, berating the conclusions of the very agencies that give him his information.

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absent

Former colleague Amy (no, the other one) has a new "executive coach." He gave her an assignment, which somehow became my assignment.

"Can you send 5-6 adjectives that describe me on my best day and 5-6 other adjectives that describe me on my worst day? Thanks!"

I lie, of course. She didn't say thanks.

Know what's really annoying me, though? I can't think of any negative adjectives. When "absent" is the first that comes to mind, you are a repugnantly pleasant co-worker.

parity

For reasons I cannot understand, the sidewalk going through my front yard is ten feet wide. Combine that with severe winters and laziness, and you purchase a snow-blower. It made quick work of my sidewalk, so I did my neighbor's, too. He did, after all, blow all of my leaves to the curb in the fall.

"I have a driveway too, you know!" he yelled out his front door.